And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
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No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
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She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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