it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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