On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
