evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
