I need help removing her.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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