I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize