i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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