i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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