I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
