Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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