ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize