omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
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I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
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I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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