i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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