Got a toothbrush?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
