I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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