Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
