these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
