Texts From Last Night

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  (352): View more from Florida

  She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.

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  (352): She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all. http://tfl.nu/8svu
  Replies (31) Good night (2633) Bad night (1217) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.

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  (902): I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out. http://tfl.nu/3h1q
  Replies (13) Good night (893) Bad night (3058) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.

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  (608): i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest. http://tfl.nu/jvc2
  Replies (68) Good night (3159) Bad night (510) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.

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  (770): I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass. http://tfl.nu/l3hc
  Replies (17) Good night (658) Bad night (4707) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"

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  (513): I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair" http://tfl.nu/ia2j
  Replies (21) Good night (560) Bad night (6058) Order T-Shirt
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  (682): View more from Texas

  why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?

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  (682): why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube? http://tfl.nu/dci4
  Replies (5) Good night (1055) Bad night (4044) Order T-Shirt
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?

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  (302): do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships? http://tfl.nu/h1g6
  Replies (149) Good night (1551) Bad night (5805) Order T-Shirt
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.

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  (289): It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack. http://tfl.nu/6xg5
  Replies (21) Good night (837) Bad night (7213) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.

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  (609): imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift. http://tfl.nu/z6oe
  Replies (31) Good night (1306) Bad night (3778) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.

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  (847): This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword. http://tfl.nu/au8n
  Replies (12) Good night (3940) Bad night (930) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday

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  (727): I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday http://tfl.nu/mihk
  Replies (3) Good night (1976) Bad night (614) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"

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  (480): Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good" http://tfl.nu/cw6w
  Replies (6) Good night (1169) Bad night (716) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.

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  (419): Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in. http://tfl.nu/ss55
  Replies (14) Good night (1457) Bad night (622) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Valid question

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  (440): At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex." (216): Valid question http://tfl.nu/clyn
  Replies (6) Good night (1410) Bad night (346)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.

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  (512): Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back. http://tfl.nu/xf8c
  Replies (5) Good night (897) Bad night (417) Order T-Shirt

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