remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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