why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
These People Are So Awkward You’ll Get Embarrassed
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
These People Encountered Celebrities in Bizarrely Normal Places
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America