I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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