Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...