Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.