dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
