he thought i was a dude.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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