Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
21 Signs That A Dude is Probably Insane
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.