She announced her abortion via fbk
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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