you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
tell me about the eggs
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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