ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird