i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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