Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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