I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.