Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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