"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?