I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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