I cockslap morals
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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