I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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