I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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