omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
