He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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