tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize