I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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