This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
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she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
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