my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize