how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
