Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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