There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
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