do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize