I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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