just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"