remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
My liver just had a heart attack.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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